Let Go; Get Lost

“We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.”

— Quarterlife Crisis

I’m 27 and I don’t know what I’m doing.

I’m sure this statement comes as no surprise to you. You, who has long since discovered the folly of thinking you’ve got life all figured out.

However, it would certainly be a surprise to 17 year old me. I can imagine the indignation that overly confident girl would feel: “You’ve had 10 years and you couldn’t get it together?! What have you been doing in all that time??”

Well, what have I been doing? I graduated from college, got a job, then another one. Moved back to the midwest, then to the true west. I made new friends, traveled, and had my fair share of late nights, mistakes and fleeting romances. Many of the things she dreamed of came true but the lack of capital “A” accomplishments, clarity of mind and certainty of purpose would have worried her as it worries me today.

At 17 the unknown was thrilling and filled with unfettered possibility. At 27 the unknown is anxiety inducing; the gulf between my potential and my reality growing wider in each unplanned moment.

But I’m starting to realize that 27 is not so different than 17. Everyday is an adventure into the unknown, an opportunity to stray from the path, to start something new.

Sure, I have more responsibilities than I did 10 years ago but the real weight I feel holding me down is Expectation. Of success. Of unwavering purpose. Of countless other tiny anchors that have left me unable to move.

So today, I say to 27 year old me:

Let go of expectation. Get lost in possibility. Embrace the adventure.

Wanna get lost with me?